A Metabolic Awakening: Reframing Psychosis from Breakdown to Breakthrough

"The difference between a madman and a mystic is that the mystic swims in the same waters in which the madman drowns." — Carl Jung

When I emerged from the depths of a depressive episode and the tangles of unrelenting suicidal ideation after my first psychotic break, I found myself in unfamiliar territory. Stability had returned, but with it came the unsettling question: Who am I now? My entire perspective on life felt fractured.

Growing up, I relished the arts, philosophy, and playful discussions about the nature of consciousness and reality. I was inspired by spirituality, open-ended conversations, questioning existence, and seeking meaning. But when my illness struck, that part of me—the seeker—became dangerous. I started to believe that my rapid unraveling was a result of my insatiable curiosity and emotional sensitivity–that I had deconstructed reality so completely, I could no longer reassemble it. I somehow glued my mind back together, but the cracks remained. The ever-looming fear of psychosis, reinforced by the numbing effects of medication, placed invisible borders around my thoughts like those shock fences that keep dogs from wandering.

Then, I discovered a tool that changed everything.

Through ketogenic and other metabolic therapies, I discovered the biochemical stabilization, energy regulation, and mitochondrial healing that have helped restore my creativity, vitality, and curious spirit. As I approach my four-year anniversary of lasting stability using metabolic therapies as my sole treatment for bipolar I disorder, my fear of psychosis continues to diminish. *(Tapering medications can be extremely dangerous and should always be done gradually with the support of a care team. Visit Inner Compass Initiative for more information on safe tapering.)  I have found not only full remission of manic and depressive symptoms but the opportunity for self-actualization through post-traumatic growth.

The Existential Adventure of Psychosis

In conversations with others whose experiences with psychosis mirror my own, I’ve noticed striking parallels—many describe it as a spiritual, heightened, multi-sensory adventure, one that is equally terrifying and exhilarating. In this state, many experience delusions as a vivid, almost hyper-real immersion into racing, unresolvable existential questions:

• Do quantum multiverses exist? Can I jump through them?

• To what extent do we create and shape our own reality?

• Do we have an immortal soul that is having a human experience for a reason?

• How do we know the world as we perceive it isn’t a simulation?

These are not inherently “crazy” questions, but the same inquiries that have been explored by religious figures, philosophers, scientists, and futurists—those who devote their lives to probing the nature of consciousness and reality.

The truth is, we know very little with certainty about the fundamental fabric of existence. Those who cling tightly to their subjective understanding of the world—insisting it is tangible, concrete, and fully definable, despite all its paradoxes and unknowns—may be the ones most deeply entangled in a web of delusions.

Redefining Sanity: The Role of Metabolic Healing

Stability through metabolic therapies helped me realize that sanity is not defined by whether or not you have "crazy" thoughts, but by whether you can maintain balance and function within this crazy world.

For years, I feared that my psychotic break was caused by probing too deeply into the challenging questions of human existence. But I now understand that was never the problem. My struggle was rooted in an underlying physiological root cause—metabolic dysfunction that impaired my brain's ability to regulate energy, leading to psychotic symptoms. By addressing this dysfunction, metabolic therapies have allowed me to heal my brain and rebuild my relationship with myself.

Countless inquisitive, sensitive, deep-thinkers have experienced psychosis and endured a diminished quality of life due to inadequate treatments. I truly believe that through this cutting-edge, root cause therapy, millions will have the opportunity to transform their lives, fully restore their cognitive abilities, reclaim their creativity, and share their unique gifts with the world. I have already had the privilege of meeting many individuals like this through our THINK+SMART community of experts by experience, a network that will only continue to grow exponentially.

Psychosis is Natural: The Dream Yoga Awakening

For the past few years, I have been captivated by Tibetan Dream Yoga, a practice that teaches individuals to achieve lucidity in their dreams—to wake up within sleep, become consciously aware and use this state intentionally for meditation, self-exploration, and spiritual growth.

I’ve read Dream Yoga by Andrew Holecek cover to cover multiple times. This poetic book beautifully describes the purpose of dream yoga as a tool for unlocking deeper dimensions of consciousness.

I’ve long recognized that practices like meditation, visualization, and self-hypnosis, especially in the hypnagogic state (the liminal space between waking and sleeping), can play a key role in behavior change and transformation. These tools work at the subconscious level, fueling neuroplasticity and helping reshape thought patterns. However, I only recently began considering another reason for my fascination with lucid dreaming and dream yoga.

The Dream-Psychosis Connection

Dr. Matthew Walker, a professor of neuroscience and one of the world’s leading sleep researchers, explains in his book Why We Sleep that we all experience temporary psychosis every night when we dream. He describes how in this state, we:

• Hallucinate

• Accept delusional beliefs as reality

• Become disoriented in time and place

• Experience heightened and erratic emotions

• Forget many of our dreams (amnesia)

Each night, we surrender to the subconscious, slipping into an altered state where reality bends, identities dissolve, and the impossible becomes possible. Upon waking, we return to our structured lives, often unaware of the surreal dreamscape we were traversing just moments before.

This insight shifted my perspective—while prolonged psychosis once made me feel inherently flawed, I now understand that psychosis is not an anomaly but an intrinsic part of the human experience. Being trapped in a psychotic state for weeks on end with no reprieve is not something I crave, nor would I ever want to return to it. However, the less I fear relapse, the more I can look back on my experiences—not with horror, but with fascination. These experiences were rich, formative, and complex—ones I will continue to unpack and extract meaning from throughout my life post-remission.

I no longer see psychosis as merely an affliction. Instead, I recognize that my intense experiences with altered states of consciousness now fuel my curiosity about the nature of self, perception, and the deeper mysteries of reality even more.

With the stability provided by metabolic therapies, I now seek to glean wisdom from the dream state–both the prolonged one I experienced during psychosis and my nightly journey– analyzing and integrating them rather than burying them in fear.  Now that I have regained control of my mind, I seek to hold it more firmly—to explore its workings and consciously attempt to train it with intention and awareness.

Awakening in Community

With the launch of THINK+SMART, we are now providing tools and insights from experts by experience to guide individuals through their journeys—from initial curiosity in metabolic therapies to behavior change, post-traumatic growth, and advocacy work.

My ability to find a silver lining in psychosis—to see it from a new perspective now that I no longer fear it—is a testament to post-traumatic growth. It has taken a long and intentional healing journey to reach a place of peace with what I experienced. For me, voyaging through my dreams and inducing lucidity with intent and awareness is a way to integrate the parts of myself that became more pronounced during psychosis. Instead of fearing those aspects, I am learning to explore them—bridging the gap between altered states and waking states in a way that enhances my well-being and strengthens my stability. In the coming months, I look forward to sharing more about my THINK+SMART strategies, like dream yoga, that have supported my recovery.

While I see myself as a seeker once again, I am no longer drowning in existential uncertainty. Instead, I float—buoyed by an ineffable warmth of universal love, a feeling heightened by the compassion and connection I experience within this the experts by experience community, where we continue to grow together, united by a shared mission:

• To advocate for change

• To inspire transformation

• To help others find their path to well-being

Healing isn’t just about remission of symptoms. It’s about rebuilding your life—reframing the past, embracing untapped potential, and creating a new vision for the future. Luckily, you do not have to go on this journey alone.